Bull’s Christmas Shopping
Bull went into the shopping mall,
His Christmas presents to buy
A clock for Aunt Maude,
A teapot for Claude
And a kite for his nephew to fly.
But Albert the sheep
With considerable cheek
(But on Bull, well, he always relies)
Had asked for a comb and some hair gel and foam
To keep his hair out of his eyes.
Now Bull did incline
This request to decline
And his preference was thus to deny
For he thought it a fad.
But to make Christmas glad
He decided to give it a try.
Now, Albert had told him,
On this he had sold him,
The best chance he had to comply
Was to divert his custom,
In Shenzhen to trust ‘em
And like everyone else, fly to buy.
Bull’s mate Pat concurred
So they followed the herd,
To Heathrow and Stansted and Gatwick,
And they checked in their cases
And took up their places
With Bull standing just behind Patrick.
Then they boarded the plane
And Bull did not complain
Though their seats, they were lacking the best room
But he chose to refrain,
Though his bowls it did strain
To follow cow Pat in the restroom.
When the plane it did land
Pat could not understand
Why Bull made a bee line for the toilet
But the cause, Bull did claim,
Was the food on the plane
And copious Red Bull to oil it.
Pat took Bull by the horn
And on him poured his scorn.
Though the argument came as a blow,
He acknowledged it true
That Bull needed the loo
So Patrick, just went with the flow.
Now, to truth I must keep
About Albert the sheep
Who had come to Shenzhen in disguise
To follow his pals
As they shopped in the malls
Intending to give them surprise.
Sheep stood in a hat shop
Specifically, that shop
To sell them wool hats in disguise
So when he did advise them
To buy the wrong size then
The hats came down over their eyes.
Thus you now see the scale
Of this admirable tale
Which I’ve told, til the cows, they come home.
It’s not about Bull
And it’s more about wool
Than it is about hair gel and foam.
So if cows should kow-tow
When before you they bow
and from shopping they’re ready to drop
Or a sheep in disguise
Pulls wool over your eyes
It’s all bull in a south China shop.
Michael Forester
December 2015
Tenerife